FYS week 4 power rankings

MIBearFan

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I'm just an average Joe. I live in a shoe box in my parents driveway with two dead hookers. I sprinkle cocaine on my cereal, because coffee just doesn't do it for me. Most days I have mild to moderate diarrhea, and all of my erections last more than four hours.

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  Why I'm a Racist POS
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  Houston, we have a problem
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  The Saints Suck

PROCTOLOGISTICS

Well, it seem s like we can’t go a week without talking about horrific officiating.

At the end of a fantastic 10 play drive, in which Mathew Stafford resembled a decent Division I quarterback, the Lions appeared to be poised to take the lead on Monday night. Stafford hooked up with all world wide receiver Calvin Johnson. As Johnson lunged toward the goal line for the go  ahead score, Seattle’s Cam Chancallor (Pay the man), made an amazing play to knock the ball loose just short of the goal line. The ball was batted out of the end zone by Seattle LB K. J. Wright, and was ruled a touchback, giving the Seahawks the ball at their own 20 yard line.

Here’s the problem,  we now know that this was a case of illegal batting, and had the referees called the penalty, Detroit would have regained possession inside the 1-yard line, half the distance from the spot of the fumble.

Not every call directly effects a game, and that’s certainly the case in the Monday night debacle. After all, there was still 1:51 remaining in the game when the errant call was made. It is very possible the Lions would have found another way to choke, or the Seahawks may have been able to score with the time remaining on the clock after a Lions score.

In a bazar twist, Lance Easley, the now infamous replacement referee for  his call on the “Fail Mary” play, says he planes to reach out to the back judge from this weeks botched call. Apparently Easley, who was treated for PTSD (obviously due to the crap he received from douchebag Packer fans, who don’t understand the rules of simultaneous possession), feels empathy for his fraternal brother, and feels he may be able to ease the pain, or at a minimum, refer him to a qualified shrink.

WEEK 5 RESULTS BASED ON RANKING

As you know, each week I make picks for the following week’s games based on my current rankings.

Last week, I took a bit of a beating (through no fault of my own). At any rate, my picks were still 8-7, putting my year to date record at 42-21.

Suck my nuts “Deep Cool”.

Bye week: Miami, Minnesota, New York Jets, Carolina (Congrats! you won’t drop in the rankings this week)

So, here’s this weeks predictions.

THIS DAY IN HISTORY (October 6)

Since I was a little windy in my opening, I’ll keep this short and sweet.

On this day in TA 3018: Strider and the Hobbits reach Weathertop. They are attacked by Nazgûl, Frodo wears the Ring and is stabbed.

Note: Nate will explain this to Gabes later, in the comments section.

FANTASY FOOTBALL FORUM

My FF team, “Deez nuts” spanked the crap out of “Team Cammy Cam Cam, by a score of 74-58.

Pro Tip: When your star player has a “O” next to there name, it means they’re not playing.

WHO’S HOT

Cin-cinn-mutha-fricken’-atti! Our favorite ginger, Andy Dalton, is on a roll.

WHO’S NOT

The Miami Dolphins. They have officially reached dumpster fire status.

YOU SAID IT

Preperation_A – These “rankings” are deeply flawed and have all the hallmarks of being the manifesto of an insane person.

JJ – If I find out “manifesto” is a negative term, you’re going on my shit list, buddy!

Big Deal – God these rankings are terribad. How much drugs do you have to ingest for these to make some semblance of sense?

Also, thanks MIB for the article!

JJ– Awe, that’s kind of you to say. You’re welcome, my friend.

IT’S TIME TO RANK ‘EM AND SPANK ‘EM