Patriots Skate in Deflategate

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I'm just an average Joe. I live in a shoe box in my parents driveway with two dead hookers. I sprinkle cocaine on my cereal, because coffee just doesn't do it for me. Most days I have mild to moderate diarrhea, and all of my erections last more than four hours.

Wells report Released

An NFL investigation released Wednesday said that New England Patriots employees likely deflated footballs used in the AFC Championship and that quarterback Tom Brady was probably “at least generally aware” of the rules violations.

According to Albert Breer, Patriots owner Robert Kraft, and head coach Bill Belichick were cleared of any wrongdoing.

FYS Reacts

Title: Deflategate
Body: Tom Brady* is fucked
Author: Horse
BP: So, those cheating fuckers were cheating fuckers.

Figured as much. Now all you armchair cunt scientists who disagreed with me can bend over and lick your own taint.
Edit
Donny33: it may not affect the outcome of the games, but it sure as fuck would tarnish brady’s legacy
TheHairy1: I see this report about deflategate conveniently came out the week after the draft. Like if NE is to lose draft picks?
Glove: I really dont care that Brady deflated a ball a few PSI. Rodgers inflates them to cater to his own game, who the hell cares?
MIB: Personally, I think a rule on the PSI in the balls is stupid as fuck. Especially now that each team uses it’s own balls.
Natesweet: God damn it. I think I have to get on a radio show again. I miss it. I need to make it happen somehow.
BSL: The situation the NFL is in is delicious. How do we discipline the team that just won the Super Bowl without fucking it up.
BWC: I hope Goodell drops the fucking hammer on those pukes.
Like Bounty-gate type punishment
Spy gate was done by the same regime. Multiple time offenders.
Take away a draft’s worth of picks.
Prove to everyone that you aren’t a pussy Goodell.
Raunchi: omg it’s so hot in here my balls are like two hard boiled eggs

And, there you have it!